Okay I am bullshiting right now. I have not been eating the way I suppose to. One of the reason is because I am living with my Aunt and I try not to be in the way too much so I never cook anymore. I am in the process of buying a house and that has put tremendous stress on me! The damn mortgage company want everything including my medical records.
It was not a good idea to drop the trainer, but I was afraid that I could not lose the mandatory 3lbs a week. I just wanted to avoid feeling like a loser. I would have beat myself up if he kicked me out of the program so I chose to leave on my own. I promise once this house is behind me I will get my shit together.
I am still walking every morning pretty regularly but eating right is 80% of losing weight. After the 4th of July I will join weight watchers. Money is really tight right now and we all know that money is needed to buy that high ass healthy food. I always wondered why the food high in cholesterol, sodium, fat and starch all cheap and the foods that will help you live longer cost more?
Just keep me in ya prayers cuz I am dealing with a lot and I steal need to lose this damn weight. Right now I weigh 203 which is not bad but by the end of Aug I need to be at least 190. I'll keep ya posted
OMG I went to my friends wedding two weeks ago and I was totally disguised by the pics of me. There were so many beautifully shaped women at the ceremony I just could not help but compare myself. All of the pics of me looked bloated and full. My boobs looked like I had to people in the head lock, my face looked like the pillsbury dough boy. I did not feel pretty at all. I deleted most of the pics of myself off of my camera. At times I do go through periods of low self esteem. I blame the weight but sometimes I wonder if it really just me.
I have friends who are fat and pretty. They are proud to be fat and don't give a damn what people think. I have been over weight for about 8 yrs.... before that I was always 140lbs and under.
I created the blog to be honest about my feeling and my inner struggles with weight. It really helps me to get out instead of holding it in all the time. Plus it's good to share your thoughts with others sometimes.
Losing weight is just the 1/2 of it!
I can definitely relate with what you are feeling. I went to my sons 8th grade graduation and I deleted the pictures of me with him because my legs looked like giant white logs! UGH!!!! And the worst part of the whole night was that when I left the house in my new outfit...I thought I looked pretty
ReplyDeletegood:( I have been doing horribly on my diet as well and I havnt even been on my blog so I am pledging right now to blog everyday!!
Much peace to you,
Windy
Lets work at it together. I know that that is pretty forward, but I need a weight loss buddy, but I need someone who is serious. We can motivate each other to weight loss oblivion .BTW i am sorta now to blogger how can I add you as a friend? :)
ReplyDeleteMandys lox or mandamoiselle is my username can't even remember. Wether we work together or not just know that it is your mind that got you where you are and only your mind that can get you out. Good luck!! ;)